Then why can't I paint you?

The dress from Goodwill, shortened yesterday.

Above, dress: Goodwill, shortened. Beret: mother's. Shoes: Aerosoles, mother's (they are a whole size too small. Ow).

Above, the back and shiny glory.

Above, I look kind of pregnant from the side. Oh well. It's not that bad in this picture because my head is tilted downward, but if I stand up straight, it looks pretty terrible.

My mother's shoes (that I am sporting above) are a whole size too small. I would wear my own flats to emphasize the pretty that is this dress, but I own only black ones, so instead I would opt for oxfords or for visually stumping my legs:

Above, shoes: blowfish from delia's.

Take that, Doc Martens.

Above, my haute couture editorial pose.