I don't need sex

because U. C. Berkeley fucks me every day.

Why is it that I purposely scheduled classes in buildings near each other, only to have the professors decide to change rooms so I now have to walk all the way across campus between back-to-back classes three days a week?

Someone is messing with me.

(Or telling me I'm fat.)

[EDIT: I've changed my mind. The walk is barely longer than the walk from astro discussion to anthro lecture was last semester. And it's Memorial Glade. And Stanley is REALLY NICE inside. And now I have an excuse to eat this cookie. Thank you, Universe.]
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