variations on a trench coat: ass-kicking edition

Because it rained for (I think) a week straight, my ratio of trench-coated vs. trench-coatless outfits is a little skewed right now, which is why I'm posting these trench coat outfits out of chronological order.

I was reading "Variations on the Death of Trotsky" by David Ives at the mall the other day, and I burst out laughing. In public. Alone. So since I have quite a few variations on this trench coat, here is

Variation I: The Ass-Kicking Edition

(No mountain-climbers' axes, ice picks, or Spanish gardeners were involved in the making of this post, although I did feel like I could kick someone's ~~axe~~ ass while wearing this.)